Some people are natural communicators.
These are the people who can make small talk with anyone, easily chat with the cashier at the grocery store, or share a few laughs and become BFF’s with a previously unknown waiter at a restaurant.
Some people say you have to have ‘the gift of gab’ in order to be a natural communicator. And while I’ve been told such a gift was bestowed upon me, I would argue with the notion that ‘the gift of gab’ makes one a good communicator.
In fact, it doesn’t.
How do I know?
Because each and every one of you reading this right now, can think of a time when you were cornered by someone with the gift of gab, who talked your ear off about absolutely nothing. Seriously – They wouldn’t stop talking about… NOTHING!
And how did you feel when you were rescued from this uber-talkative, dear-God-please-leave-me-alone nightmare?
You felt freedom.
And occasionally, like you needed to take a shower.
That’s the universal experience which proves there’s a difference between “natural communicators” and good communicators. And just because you’re not one of those people who can easily strike up a conversation with a stranger in the elevator, it doesn’t mean you can’t become a good communicator.
You can.
Here’s how…
1. Know Yourself
Now, just FYI… The phrase, “Know Yourself” doesn’t have to be a deeply compelling and overtly philosophical exercise… It simply means, “What’s something unique about me that other people can remember?” Did you grow up on a farm? Are you from a different part of the country than where you live now? Did you once have a completely different career verses what you’re doing now? Are you 1 of 8 siblings? Did you have a unique or crazy pet growing up?
You should always have 3-5 things about yourself that you can pull out – whether you’re at a networking event (so you stand out amongst the crowd) or if you just want to put a smile on the cashier’s face. Then, consider ways you can weave these unique facts into the conversation. I’m not asking you to be all pushy-salesy like the toxic guy mentioned above… I’m saying, you might be surprised how often you find an opening that directly applies to the conversation, when you “know yourself” and have a few unique facts outlined in your brain ahead of time.
2. Know Your Business
Same principle here, but with a different purpose. Knowing 3-5 unique things about your business is just good marketing sense. After all, if your product/service is the same as anyone else you can google, you should probably make a point of distinguishing yourself apart from the competition.
Are you super-serving a niche market? Do you have a great story about how you got started? Did you discover the wrong way of doing things before you patented the right way? Did you hire your grandmother within the first 6 months of your business? Again, I’m not saying you need to offer all of these things in one brief conversation…. But I am saying, that when you know what makes your business different or better than your competition, you should be able to articulate your unique selling points in order for a total stranger to remember you.
3. Know How to be Human
Now… The whole point of this exercise isn’t to verbally abuse complete strangers with your new-found talking points. The purpose of good communication is to make the other person feel at ease with you. And here’s the secret… When someone else feels at ease with you – THEY REMEMBER YOU!
And to be honest, THAT’S the mark of a good communicator… Someone who knows themselves, knows their business, and knows how to naturally weave these things into a conversation with confidence and grace… Confidence that connects, and grace that causes other people to feel awesome about themselves. Storing a few unique facts in your brain ahead of time causes you to relax. And when you’re relaxed, you get to pro-actively guide the conversation wherever you would like it to go.
Before your next cannabis event, or before you try to make small talk with the guy in line next to you, take a few moments to recognize the wonderful and unique things about your business and about yourself. Then remember the purpose of your communication is to put the other person at ease. The more tidbits you have stored in your brain ahead of time, the more likely you are to connect with random people, and be positively remembered for your communication skills.
Lord knows, we’re already full of over-talkative, slightly slimy, semi-inappropriate, Mr. Nothing-Sayers.
Carrie Cox
Co-Founder and Corporate Liaison
The Hemp Business Advisors